That effort failed. Big time.
J and I pulled out all the strings of Christmas lights from last year to see what worked. Ummm... yeah. That answer would be 'not many'.
We got two strings working and started putting them on the tree. The first one went on relatively easily - I held the ball of lights and walked around the tree in circles while J walked behind me and shoved them in towards the trunk. Pine needles were flying left and right and I had a nice layer of them stuck to the bottoms of my bare feet (why the hell didn't I put on shoes???). Then we plugged in the next sting and went to work. Halfway through the wire got tangled and when I pulled on it to get the little knot out half of the lights went out. Son of a ...
We both stood there (J standing on a bar stool and me on the ground) and checked every single light that was out. The stupid things still didn't come on.
At this point it was 9:30, I still needed to pump, and I had about had it with the lights. I told him to forget it and I would just go buy some new ones during lunch. We took off the half working string of lights and admired our handiwork.
Yeah - that tree is still looking pretty sad.
At least we got a few of the other decorations out...